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26^th February Hash # 089 Alboleas Hares Petal & Dyspraxia

11^th March TBA

25^th March TBA

26^th April Vera Half Marathon Plus marshals required See http://www.whats-on.es/Events.htm

 

Hash # 088 Los Cabreras

The ‘Mind Your Head’ hash.

This had to be the coldest day of the year so far, but never-the-less Indalo Hash House Harriers gathered at the home of, Ageing Happy & Flower Power, near Los Cabreras, which is somewhere between the middle of nowhere and the back of beyond, but where, surprisingly, the sea could be seen between the mountains.

After the usual pre hash formalities, the chalk talk and the introduction of two virgins, the hash got under way, with the walkers going one way, and the runners going in the opposite direction (sneaky).

The trail was well marked and easy to follow, even the false trails, through the stunning scenery of this area, and after about 1½ hours the start/end was in sight.

Refreshments and nibbles were available for everyone when they returned, and then the ‘circle’ was formed, all the usual down-downs were awarded, including, short cutting, the FRB, use of real names, watering the campo and pocket billiards.

We also had two ‘naming ceremonies’, Cosmo, for offering centimos for his subs will, from now on be called ‘No Cents’, and Don, for just being a computer geek (sorry, expert), will now be known as ‘Soft-Wear’.

At the ‘on-after’, Flower Power offered the group four different soups and a mountain of bread, in their old restored cortijo, which had some low doorways, and on numerous occasions the call, “mind your head” was heard, only to be followed by some naughty expletives, as the call was too late.

A damn good hash, in a beautiful area and a nourishing on-after, so hopefully we’ll be invited back there soon……Hint hint

 

Hash # 087 Vera

Today we started our hash from Iceland, not the Republic of Iceland in the North Atlantic, but in the car park of the Iceland store in Vera. For January the weather was perfect for hashing - clear sky, warm sun and a slight breeze.

20 of us, including two visitors from TruroH3, met just before 11:00 to hear the trail instructions from the Hare, “Economical”.

This hash was supposed to have a ‘Scottish’ theme, and there was a spattering of tartan here and there, but not much more, may be they were just expecting some whiskey to drink? No way, whiskey is far too expensive, it was Scottish theme after all!!!

The running pack departed the car park and quickly lost the trail! (The trail we did find turned out to be the homeward journey “scent”). Eventually with a little prompting from the hare, we were on track again, and after about 15 minutes we caught up with the walkers who had found the correct trail. The scent led us through the campo along tracks and tarmac without any real difficult terrain to negotiate.

The highlight of the trail turned out to be some scarecrows tied to poles, giving rise to some smart comments for which “down downs” were issued later in the hash circle. Other down downs were given, for watering the trail (or was it the car park) to two hash virgins and other misdemeanours.

Hash # 086 El Rincon

The ‘Red Dress’ Hash 2012

Well, where to start?

Perhaps with an apology to the residents of El Rincon and La Cinta near Arboleus, who had their Sunday morning tranquillity disturbed by the raucous visit of 18 Hashers and Harriett’s, all suitably decked out in their stunning red dresses. The ‘Red Dress’ Hash – where everyone wears – guess what? – a red dress, is a long standing tradition of international hashing. If you really want to know more, take a look at http://www.reddressruns.org/.

In the red dress ‘fashionista’ stakes, a special mention should be made to Norman Bates for his Eddy Izzard impression; Puff for just being so gorgeous and blonde (and more about him later): Harvey the Old English Sheepdog for really entering into the spirit of the event as well, and Key Fob for doing the whole hash with his ‘cock’ sticking out!

An excellent hash often starts with excellent coffee, this time at the El Castillo Bar. Then off we went across the campo; two equal group of walkers and runners, plus assorted mutts. The trails meandered very enjoyably on a sunny morning, through the rambla and the orange groves. January 8^th and we all had our ‘strappy tops’ on. We also made an occasional foray into residential roads, where the Hash was greeted from garden gates with puzzlement (what are these mad people about?) and also much mirth, before returning to the vicinity of the bar for ‘the circle’.

Numerous ‘down downs’ were issued. Most notably to Tonto and Petal for scrumping oranges: Ma Bates and Flowery Knickers for watering the campo and (the tartan tighted) Tenna Lady for thinking this hash was for Burn’s Night. We also had a naming – from now on, Stuart will be known as ‘Tacky’!

Then we went for the On After (lunch and drinks at the Bar). As promised a special mention of Puff’s antics. Not only did he scare all the young Spanish children back into their mother’s arms, by thrusting condom shaped coloured balloons, twisted into animal shapes into their arms: he upset the waiter’s girlfriend by sitting on the waiter’s knee; and then he completely ruined the reputation of the said waiter and the bar, by coaxing him into a red skirt! For what end – who knows?

 

Hash # 085 Lubrin

“The Hash that was a ‘chuffin’ long way” – Hash

18 of us, and 5 mutts assembled in Lubrin. Returners, Tonto, Prof and Denise were especially welcomed.

If you haven’t been, Lubrin is a pretty and notably friendly town, in the Sierra de los Filabres, and well worth a visit.

The walkers set of for a very pleasant and scenic stroll led by DQ, into the campo around the periphery of the town.

The runners set off in the other direction, along ramblas, through small villages and up mountains; as well as a guided tour of the olive oil factory. Key Fob said they had even got to the outskirts of Mojacar!

Just before dusk the walkers and the runners were reunited.

The hare, Two Hats, reckoned he had learned the tactic of deliberately ‘getting things wrong’, as a bairn, (he’s Scottish). “If you break enough pots while washing them, they don’t make you do it again!” Unfortunately for Two Hats, the Hash verdict is that, he just needs more practice on laying
trails!

At the circle, many ‘down down’s’ were issued. Key Fob in his Santa suit got one for coming too soon! Bog Trotter said ‘he normally does’, and then she got hers for incitement to break hash custom and practice. Click It and Denise didn’t walk; they ambled and chatted, and just had too much of an enjoyable and relaxing time! This isn’t how ‘Hashing’ is meant to be.T

Then we went for an enjoyable ‘On After’ at the bar in Aljibe, where Puff chatted up the barmaid!

Hash # 084 La Yegua Alta

The Cosmo ‘Special’ Hash

17 Hashers and Harriets and 6 mutts, assembled at Yegua Alta on a beautiful, clear and
cloudless morning.

Yegua Alta –‘alta’ - so high - that you could see right through the Boca de Oria, all the
way across to Tetica (‘the witches tit’) in the Sierra de los Filabres; and in another direction– Gigante, or if you prefer Muela, in the Sierra Maria – aren’t us hashers lucky!

Off we went – runners and walkers through the almond groves; and to keep a long hash short,
an hour and half later, we arrived back at Tina and Cosmo’s place, for the circle and ‘On After’.

Various miscreants were identified and punishments issued.

First, there were enough campo waterers, to fill a campsite toilet block.

Dancing Queen got one for – for fiddling with something.

Eco – got his for wasting hash resources and throwing beer on himself

Ma Bates got into all kinds of trouble, for all kinds of things, and Norman said he would be having words!

And finally Big Nuts got his for playing with his nuts

It was announced that ‘Marmite’ – would be one of the carriers of the Olympic torch next year,
when it travels through Derbyshire. Well done that Harriet!

Then we enjoyed an excellent On After with delicious soup and cake supplied by Tina and Cosmo.

Hash # 083, Los Alamos

“The Standing Room Only”, Hash

8 virgins, as many mutts and 21 hashers and harriets assembled at Los Alamos - a tiny hamlet hidden well off the road between Chirivel and Oria. A really good turn out, with an international cast!

Hare Puff gave the talk and chalk – though in this case it was very earthy looking sand. He also brought his potty with him in case he got caught short while explaining the trail marks. He explained that the trail was quite short, but had some deviousness in it. Bit like him really.

The runners went their way like lambs to the slaughter, eventually climbing to the old hermitage that nestles in the mountains nearby. They were grumbling when they returned though. They reckoned Puff must have had a ‘few’ when he laid that trail.

The walkers had a really enjoyable meander along the tracks through the almond groves, and by some miracle they eventually returned to the start, because their hare Bog Trotter hadn’t a clue where she was supposed to go.

Needless to say, with such a large turn out, misdemeanours on the route were very many, so consequently, very many ‘down downs’ were issued. Most notably to Bog Trotter for using a map: (we are hashers, we follow a trail), to Cosmo for lying down on the hash; to Flower Power for running on the walking route, and to Slippery Fingers for watering the campo, instead of using Puff’s potty.

And then the really excellent ‘on after’ at Puff and Click Its place – to enjoy Scotch Broth and cakes, which were washed down with real ale from the Velez Rubio Real Ale Brewery.

There was a bit of a rumpus though, when that dastardly hasher ‘Big Nuts’, nicked ‘Norman’s’ beer.

Hash # 082 Write Up, Arboleas

The ‘Paint markings - possibly by thieves’ Hash

On Arboleus Forum – “Awoke this morning to find red paint markings leading from the main Zurgena - Arboleas road, leading to our house in the camino. Have heard of this type of thing before so be on the lookout. Some-one comes around and does the marking and different crooks turn up in a vehicle that won't be recognised. Have deleted all the markings. Beware and be on guard.”

Yes – they did need to be afraid, to be very afraid – because the Indalo Hash maraudered through the sleepy Sunday morning village of Arboleus this week. All the shutters were down and their daughters locked up, by the time a good turnout of umpteen virgins, some hashers and Harriett’s and 4 mutts assembled at the pool bar in Arboleus.

In fact it was a really good turn out from the Virgins. We had the “The Swiss family Dinnes; Stuart and Denise from Arboleus, via Yorkshire (but we won’t hold that against them – much!); John and Sandra from ChesVegas (that’s in Derbyshire) and Rarebit’s mate Catherine. Birthday girl, Tina came too.

And, ‘no name’ Pete and Marmite, also from ChesVegas put in their annual appearance

Like many good Hashes – and this was a good one, it started with a reviving coffee, for all except Hares DQ, Rarebit and Katherine who had decided to leave ‘summer time’, a week before the rest of the world, and Stacey and David who were just bone idle, or maybe had something better to do, rather than get there in good time.

So groups of walkers and runners set off on a fine morning into the hinterland of Arboleus. …. And it was good job we had our ‘Hares’ with us, because some fearful residents had removed all traces of our route in certain places.

We did get see the old stone corn-threshing circle though, and went through some interesting campo with fine views. Along the way, some slopes were a little steep, and Ma Bates called for some help at one of these to bring her safely down.

“Jeez – you are such a girlie”, was the refrain from 7 year old Riley of the ‘Swiss Family’; who also happened to be really good at finding those red trail markers that hadn’t been eradicated by the residents of Arboleus.

Puff lost his glasses. He wears them on his nose, but didn’t realise he’d lost them for 20 minutes. So a search party set out, and eventually recovered them. Rearrange this well-known phrase or saying. “Pillock, a what”!

Eventually runners and walkers were all reunited to the pool bar.

The circle formed (I do know that) but I had so many ‘down downs’ myself, I can’t really remember what happened, other than we had some namings, and it was pretty rowdy.

This was also due to the fact that on this hash Circle, for the first time, we had a waitress – a ‘camarera’, young August from the Swiss family, who was really efficient in making sure that everyone got their punishment.

The first naming was for, Stacey and David, who had turned up in the ‘wrong trousers’, so from now on they will be known as Wallace and Grommit. The other naming was for young Riley (of the Swiss family) who not only was really good at spotting the marks, but also had Ma Bates sorted too! From now on he will be known as ‘Spot On’!

Hash # 081, Chirivel

The ‘Bandit is back’ Hash

He had been lost in France for 6 months, but now Bandit has returned to the ample bosom of the Indalo Hash. Actually though, he didn’t really seem all that impressed, especially as he had to share his space with the 3 other mutts, who had assembled with their hashers, at Key FOB’s and Bog Trotters place, up past Chirivel way.

Another surprise was the arrival of Norman Bates, who only the day before had given his apologies, cos it was Ma’s birthday, and also they needed to sort out for some visitors on that day. Anyway, Norman claimed that such was the magnificence and generosity of his gifts that he bestowed on her for her birthday, that Ma decided she didn’t want him under her feet when she was busy, so she sent him packing.

So off we went in glorious sunshine, 10 hashers, 2 Virgins and 4 mutts to explore the really delightful countryside squeezed between the Sierras - Estancias and Marias. Through extensive almond groves, melon patches and small vineyards we meandered. Sometimes, you have to be grateful to be a hasher, just to explore these places that you just wouldn’t see otherwise.

And then, we were all returned to Cortijo Alto for the circle.

Down Downs were issued all around – most notably to Puff for missing his plane; Virgin Stacy for wearing trousers and can you believe it, Norman Bates for front running!

Then Fred got his Hash name – from now on he is to be known as Big Nuts – I can’t imagine why.

Then most of us went for an On After at the ‘brothel’!

Hash # 080, Turre

The hash that was made in Cornwall

Turre was the destination for the 80^th Hash, where Dishy Goolies (Norman had thought his name was ‘Crinkly Bollocks’) and Bomber have a holiday home.

A motley crew of mutts, hashers and virgins met at Stoney’s Bar.

Dishy Goolies gave the talk and chalk and explained some of the mysteries of the West Country marks that he’d used in laying the trail. Then off we went along ramblas and tracks around the hinterland of Turre. Bomber guided the walkers, and the marks made sense, and we eventually arrived at an attractive fuente in the town where some of us enjoyed a cool drink of fresh water, and Puff and Jonathan had a ‘wash and brush up’!

Soon we were returned to the bar, and the West Country way of doing things was again demonstrated in the form of a huge table of assorted sandwiches. Cheers!

At the circle the usual down downs were made – nothing spectacular this time – only bit of short cutting by Shoot em Up and a FRB to LBW (more Cornish visitors) of note.

Thanks guys for a great morning.